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SubscriptionsAuthor: Otto English
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‘I’m A Non-Entity Get Me Out Of Here’
Otto English has been watching Nigel Farage in the jungle so you don’t have to.
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‘Yes Gillian, the Tories have done a F**cking Good Job… of Ruining Britain’
Like some effluent King Midas, everything the Conservative Government has touched has turned to crap, writes Otto English
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Rishi Sunak’s Summer Holiday Diary
Like millions of ordinary, hard-working, British billionaire families, it can be hard to make it look like you are having to juggle the finances for a summer holiday, Rishi Sunak tells Otto English
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Dead Cats and Transphobic Lies
The political and media firestorm over a school girl claiming to identify as a cat, turns out to be a story ‘too good to check’. Byline Times has spoken to a witness
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Fake Cats and the Legitimisation of Hate
The tale of a schoolgirl identifying as a cat has become catnip to the anti-trans media machine, including the BBC and ITV. But the real story is of weaponised bigotry
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Rishi Sunak’s Favourite Things
As the Prime Minister reveals that his favourite author is Jilly Cooper – he tells Otto English about some of his other favourites in music, food, movies and sport
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Coronation Stricken: The Sound of Slamming Portaloos
Otto English joined the crowds to see if he would feel any emotion at the crowning of a new king. He did. Rage.
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REVEALED: Leaked Memos Lay Bare Sunak’s War with Johnson over PM Gongs
Correspondence seen by Byline Times reveals all manner of advisors, relatives, friends and animals being lined up for honours by the former Prime Minister
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‘The Curtain Falls on the Boris Johnson Show’
The former Prime Minister’s appearance before the Privileges Committee exposed – once and for all – the great charade behind his buffoonery, writes Otto English
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Manufacturing Discontent: The 15-Minute City Conspiracy
Otto English takes a deep dive into the chilling world of a big new theory that has caught the eye of libertarian influencers, extremists and members of the public alike
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The White Knuckle Ride of 2022
From Partygate to Trussomics, the death of the Monarch, and the humiliation of Vladimir Putin, OttoEnglish’s review of the year takes us on a roller coaster of major fails and meteoric falls
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Her Majesty The Queen: 21 April 1926 – 8 September 2022
Otto English reflects on the passing of Britain’s longest-reigning monarch
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Liz Truss’ Leaked Acceptance Speech
Otto English has got his hands on Boris Johnson’s successor’s inaugural speech as PM
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Ready For Rishi: Sunak’s Appeal to Conservative Party Voters
Ahead of ballots going out in the Tory leadership race, Otto English has been leaked a draft of Rishi Sunak’s pitch to Conservative members Dear Fellow Normal Conservative Human Beings! Or as I like to put it “Hi Guys!” Wow. Well, here I am – just an average, ordinary billionaire standing before you, asking you…
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Boris Johnson: The Naked Emperor Exposed
The Prime Minister resigned in much the same fashion as he had ruled over the country, with lies and self-delusion, observes Otto English
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Hating Boris Johnson
Otto English explains how he became an expert on the boy who wanted to be ‘World King’ and why he cannot now bear to write a single word about the man
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MENSA Name Change Sparks Fury
Otto English reveals another controversial branding change in the name of gender equality
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Putin’s Unjust War and the Enabling of Monsters
Otto English explores the Russian President’s warped justifications for the invasion of Ukraine that should terrify us all
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Ms Dorries Goes to the Barricades
Otto English has already imagined how the Culture Secretary could write up the last few tumultuous days in Westminster in her (in)imitable novelistic style
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Otto English’s 2021 Round-Up: Part Three
Downing Street Christmas parties, Omicron, North Shropshire – the end of 2021 was a hellish one for Boris Johnson’s Government
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Otto English’s 2021 Round-Up: Part Two
Euro 2020, a manufactured ‘culture war’, anti-vaxxers, a rare resignation and the fall of Kabul – the summer of 2021 was an eventful one
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Otto English’s 2021 Round-Up: Part One
Brexit, Coronavirus, insurrection – the first five months of the year were packed with concerning developments on many fronts
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A War Christmas: What Exactly Are We Remembering?
Otto English explores how Remembrance Sunday has been commercialised and weaponised to feed hollow national myths
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Playing With History Is Playing With Fire
The Coronavirus pandemic should have been the wake-up call to ‘Never-Gonna-Happenism’ and the lure of empty populism, says Otto English
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Luftwaffle: Fantasy Nostalgia Betrays the Past, and the Present
Otto English explores the trend among Brexiters to summon myths about World War Two It’s a day of the week, so right-wingers are busy invoking World War Two again. In a country where virtually no-one goes to church any more, ‘The War’ has become a de-facto religion for many a Brexit-minded Conservative. And several have…
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Levelling Down – Boris Johnson’s Other Conference Speech
Byline Times is reliably informed that Boris Johnson has prepared two speeches for his appearance at the Conservative Party Conference tomorrow – Otto English has been leaked Version A
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‘Ready for a Culture War’: Meet the ‘Common Sense’ Conservative MPs Behind the ‘Anti-Woke’ Manifesto
Otto English investigates the MPs behind the Common Sense Group, modelled on the ERG, which seeks to bring the vitriol of Brexit to the ‘War Against Woke’
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Fake History: The New Brexiter Great Crusade
In the second part of his look at Brexit ‘campaigning’ groups, Otto English explores the attempts of those trying to weaponise their versions of British history and turning it into an orthodoxy which cannot be challenged
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Past Imperfect: Astroturfing History
As the battles of Brexit morph into a culture war, Otto English detects a pattern among the ‘concerned citizens’ demanding Britain ‘takes back control’ of its past
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Googlies for Global Britain
Otto English has been leaked the first draft of the list of trade envoys suggested by International Trade Secretary Liz Truss. Byline Times cannot guarantee its authenticity
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England’s Upper Classes – A Dangerous Cult
Otto English shares the story of his late mother’s ‘double life’ and explores how class continues to define British society in damaging, limiting ways
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The Virus of Entitlement and the Epidemic of Deference
With Dominic Cummings’ latest revelation that Boris Johnson didn’t want a lockdown as the majority of those dying from COVID-19 were over-80s, Otto English explores why the Prime Minister’s toxic brand of upper-class elitism is never called-out or questioned
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Englishness Evolves
Otto English charts the different strands of English identity over the years and how a dark turn may now be giving way to something altogether more inclusive, decent and inspiring
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A Tale Told by an Idiot: Exclusive Extracts from Boris Johnson’s Book on Shakespeare
Otto English has procured an advanced copy of the Prime Minister’s book on the Great Bard
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From Machiavelli to Winnie the Pooh. Johnson’s Unfitness Confirmed – But Why Only Now?
Otto English dissects Dominic Cummings’ latest revelations about the Prime Minister’s character and his own role in Boris Johnson’s rise
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England v Germany: A Short History of Losing It
As the two countries meet in the knockout stages of Euro 2020, Otto English explains why – when it comes to jingoism and disgrace – one side is always the loser
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God Save the Queen: Still Jousting in the Junior Common Room
Otto English doesn’t think the latest skirmish in the culture wars is a ‘dead cat’ but shows a generation of politicians bereft of ideas and obsessed with campus politics
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Not the Royal Yacht Britannia: Waiving the Rules
Otto English celebrates another costly Boris Johnson project because this time the British people might just cotton on to the cavalcade of nonsense…
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The UK-Australia Trade Deal: A Tale of Brexit Insanity
Otto English dissects the disadvantages that a free trade agreement between the two countries would bring to the UK
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The Apotheosis of Apophenia: Conspiratorial Minds
What links the assassinations of Lincoln and Kennedy to Coronavirus denial? Otto English has found a pattern…
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Project Fear – The Writing Was Always on the Wall
By dismissing all the warnings about the threat to peace in Northern Ireland posed by Brexit, Boris Johnson has put lives in danger in the name of power and ideology, says Otto English
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The Future of British Broadcasting – Insider Spills GB News Beans
In a world exclusive interview, a GB News insider speaks to Otto English about what the soon-to-be-launched TV channel has up its sleeve
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A Race to the Bottom: The Weird World of the 2021 London Mayoral Election
Otto English provides the lowdown on all those hoping to lead the running of the capital… and only just emerges from the rabbit hole
